I keep hearing how 2011 was a rough year for a lot of people, so I’m counting myself lucky that it didn’t seem so bad to me, not bad at all. It was a quiet year of settling happily into a certain kind of life. I’m totally okay with that. I have a feeling 2012 will be more of a big decision kind of year.
In 2011, I spent time creating a happy household with my best friend, making plans for our future together; this next year will be about putting the plans into action. There will be more traveling and yet less uprooting, and probably a lot more expanding of our little bubble of comfort and even more plans. I’m happy to know that our future just keeps growing steadily but not uncomfortably.
My job developed into a career this past year, a career I never thought I’d have or even want, something I’m still not sure about. This year will be about where that is going to take me, what new opportunities will arise. I feel like I’ve learned a lot about what I don’t want, so this year I might have to stop being such a chicken and make decisions towards what I do actually want.
I joined a gym for the first time last spring and actually gained some resolve over the summer, because I don’t make resolutions at the normal time everyone else does. I’ve been going 3-4 times a week ever since, and feel so much better on a regular basis.
What I want for myself this year is based on feelings. I want to feel:
- Accomplished/productive: I want to set and achieve goals for myself, both professionally and personally. Maybe setting goals is what people do right now, but I find I achieve more when I continually set goals and check them off, rather than create a list of things at the beginning of the year and fail to accomplish them. I want to feel proud of what I do on a regular basis.
- Peaceful: I want to relax. Like, seriously, stop thinking so hard. I’m not like my sisters, where I feel like I have to do a million things and get everything done and please everyone. My body is not stressed by that kind of determination. I don’t really get a ton of things done or have a bunch of hobbies. But my brain hurts by caring so much about nothing, by working so hard to force an office-friendly personality, by struggling to feel normal (which only makes me feel worse, obviously). I want to gain peace by letting the little things go, by not giving a shit. I have been so happy this year, but I have not been carefree. I want my day-to-day happiness to be compounded with a feeling of peace.
I am already so in love, both literally and also figuratively in love with my life and where it’s headed. I am so lucky to be this happy, and am excited for this year to put things in motion that could secure an even greater future.
First tights of the season! Tights + boots + shirtdress + apple cider & oatmeal at my desk = officially fall.
All the Single Ladies - Refusing to Settle
This article is thought-provoking and also somehow feels like a relief.
“By blithely deeming biology a nonissue, I’m conveniently removing myself from arguably the most significant decision a woman has to make. But that’s only if you regard motherhood as the defining feature of womanhood - and I happen not to.”
So many people respond to my not wanting to have kids by stating that I will totally want them someday - once my biological clock kicks in. I find this totally offensive, not just because it makes it sound like my decision isn’t valid, but also because it implies that I actually have no control over that life choice. Obviously this article is more about the myths surrounding the single woman and marriage, and I’ve gathered so much from this thought-provoking discussion. Both marriage and reproduction are mind-blowing concepts that I haven’t quite figured out, and this article makes me feel totally better about that.
Um, gross. Please do not click any ad that blames women getting ugly for the failure of their relationships - we’re usually pretty convinced of that all on our own.
reality bites
I can’t believe how much I hate this week, and it’s only Tuesday.
Life is way too short to spend time wishing it would pass more quickly. It makes me mad thinking about how much time I waste being frustrated. I know we can’t enjoy everything we do, but with the exception of necessary evils like paying bills, getting out of bed in the morning, and exercising, it should be mostly pleasant, right?
Something’s gotta give, I just don’t know what or how yet.
(Source: Flickr / tylerknott)
April is my hero.
I had a book, a book that presented itself to me at just the right moment, as books always seem to do, and if that—the power of literature—is the big thing I believe in, that’s more than enough for me.
The Book Lady, “On the Magic of Reading the Right Book at the Right Time” - my new favorite blog, both local to Richmond and centered around one of the most important things in my life. Literature is a religion I’m on board with.
